


Incomplete Realities

by akisazame



Category: Persona 4
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bad Ending, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-05
Updated: 2014-08-05
Packaged: 2018-02-11 20:16:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,250
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2081706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/akisazame/pseuds/akisazame
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The truth of the matter was, they had never stood a chance.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Incomplete Realities

It would take approximately four months before Yosuke would actually admit it to himself, and it wasn't until the end of the world was quite literally staring him in the face before he would admit it to anyone else. The truth of the matter was, they had never stood a chance. 

All of the reasons -- excuses, really -- for putting off their trip into the TV world had seemed perfectly valid and logical at the time. The start of the school year was always far too eventful for anyone to properly keep up with, especially if your name was Souji Seta and you had a seemingly insatiable need to bite off more than a second year high school student should rightfully be allowed to chew. It wasn't that they didn't think that rescuing Yukiko-san was important; of course it was, but there always seemed to be something else. Souji had practice for the soccer team, then King Moron announced a "surprise" test and they'd all had to study, and then, on one particularly undignified Sunday, Yosuke had caught a horrible stomach bug and been unable to go out. It was simply one small thing after another until they suddenly realized that it had been raining for two days in a row and that this was probably their last chance.

They had explored the bottom two floors of the castle on their first trip inside, when they'd had to rescue Chie from herself, but they quickly realized that whatever they had explored was a mere fraction of the massive structure that stretched into the red-black sky. Teddie helped as much as he could, but they spent a disconcerting amount of time walking in circles, doubling back on themselves, finding every dead end before finally reaching the stairs to what they desperately hoped to be the final floor, only to be greeted by another long hallway with no apparent end.

There was no concept of time inside the castle, so it might have been hours or days before they wearily ascended the final flight of stairs, leading them to a massive door instead of yet another hallway. Yosuke glanced at the others out of the corner of his eye; Souji was pale and thin-lipped, but looked okay otherwise, and Chie was still fired up with the same boundless determination that had managed to push them this far. For his part, Yosuke felt like he'd run three marathons back-to-back-to-back, his energy drained and his vision a little hazy, but he knew that even suggesting a break would likely result in his own untimely death at Chie's hands.

Instead he turned to look directly at Souji and somehow managed to spare enough energy to turn up one corner of his mouth in a smile. "About time, huh? We ready, partner?"

He wasn't sure what kind of answer he was expecting, really. The whole operation had been conducted with the utmost of speed, or at least as much speed as they could manage while constantly getting turned around and lost. But now, right here at the very end, Souji seemed to be hesitating. His brows knitted together in thought, and he leaned his sword against the wall -- the first time he'd put the weapon down since they'd come in, Yosuke noted -- to rummage around in the pockets of his school jacket.

The pickings were predictably slim: three peach seeds, two cans of Bon Juice, one Dokudami Tea, and one medicine. Yosuke wasn't particularly surprised; they hadn't come in very well prepared in the first place, and their furious pace and desperation had caused them to be far more reckless with their supplies than they should have been. He frowned at Souji, who in turn was staring at the array of goods, brow furrowed in thought.

"We'll each have a peach seed now," he said finally, sounding much more sure than Yosuke felt. "Yosuke and I will each take a juice; Chie's physically the strongest and will be able to put up the best fight if we all run out of energy." Chie nodded enthusiastically in response to this; she was hopping impatiently from foot to foot, though Yosuke couldn't tell how much of that was just adrenaline and how much was the kind of energy they needed to put up a good fight. 

The Dokudami Tea was all but useless to them, so all that remained was the medicine. Yosuke would have been lying if he said he couldn't use it, but he couldn't bring himself to speak up, not when they had no idea what kind of monster they were about to face once they passed through the castle's final door. Besides, he definitely wasn't the only one; both Chie and Souji were putting on brave faces, but he couldn't believe that they weren't just as battered and bruised as he was, if not more. 

"We should save this," Souji said finally, pocketing the medicine along with the tea. "Just in case."

"She's definitely behind that door!" Teddie's piped up suddenly. "But Sensei, are you sure that you don't want to go back? You all look pretty tired..."

"No way!" Chie interjected, a vicious edge to her voice. "There's no way we can come this far and just leave Yukiko behind! Don't even think about mentioning it again, you dumb bear!" She punctuated her statement by marching forward and opening the door, while Yosuke lunged to hold her back a half-second too late. 

The room was similar to the rest of the castle, but larger and somewhat more lavishly decorated. Yukiko was standing atop a flight of red carpeted stairs -- but no, that wasn't Yukiko at all, because Yukiko was slumped over on the floor in front of the dais, pale-faced and wide-eyed. The Shadow glared at the three of them as they approached, as if they had been interrupting something, before her face twisted into a sickeningly familiar smile.

"I knew it," Yosuke muttered, glancing back and forth between the Yukiko on the floor and the not-quite-Yukiko on the steps. "There's two of her!" He edged up just behind Souji, gripping the handles of his wrenches as best he could with his tired muscles and sweat-slick palms.

"Well, well, well, it looks as though my three princes have _finally_ come to see me," the Shadow said, her voice sounding like Yukiko's but _not,_ twisted and resonant in the same way that the other Shadows had been. It was a sound which still haunted Yosuke, as much as he didn't want to admit it. "And here you were, poor pathetic thing, thinking they wouldn't show up, that they would just abandon us here to waste away all alone. My dear princes, won't one of you take me to a land far, far away, where no one knows me? If you're my Prince, you'd take me there, won't you? C'mon... pretty please?"

From there it was only a matter of time before Yukiko rejected her Shadow fully, and it cackled and transformed into a huge red bird in a cage. "Hang in there, Yukiko!" Chie shouted, rushing forward and crushing her tarot card with a flourish. Tomoe shimmered into being, swinging in low with her naginata. The bird countered with a wave of fire that brought Chie to her knees.

Both Souji and Yosuke rushed to her side; Yosuke summoned his own Persona to bathe Chie in a healing light, but the effort of it was almost painful. He knew that he wouldn't be able to call on Jiraya much more, which put them in a dire position. "Souji, I..."

Yosuke was interrupted by another blast of fire from Yukiko's Shadow, and this time it hit all three of them. Souji clutched at his chest, visibly shaken; Chie was barely clinging to consciousness.

"You can't fight it like this!" Teddie said, and his voice sounded like it was coming from very far away. "It's too powerful!"

"N- no," Chie coughed out, placing her palm on the carpeted floor and trying to force herself to her feet. "W- we can't... w- we have to..."

"Teddie's right," Souji managed, leaning on his sword for support; whichever Persona he'd been using must've been just as vulnerable to fire as Chie's. "That Shadow is going to kill us."

Ignoring Chie's feeble protests, they retreated back through the door and down the stairs, where Teddie cast the spell that returned them to the entrance hall. Before they left through the exit TVs, Souji gave Chie the medicine he'd saved.

"Maybe there's still time," Yosuke said softly to Souji in the Junes lobby as the rain poured down outside. "We'll come back tomorrow."

The next morning, Yukiko Amagi was found dead on a television antenna.

\---

Yukiko Amagi's death, even more so than the two before it, shook the town to its core. Mayumi Yamano was a famous television personality, and Saki Konishi was a familiar face to her classmates and the people who frequented her family's liquor store, but the Amagi Inn was a cultural fixture in Inaba. Once the body turned up on that antenna, the town descended into chaos. Yukiko's mother had to be hospitalized a day later, and the inn stopped accepting new reservations, only staying open to oblige the customers who had booked rooms before the tragedy had occurred. The reporters who were descending on the town like locusts had to take trains from hotels in Okina every day in order to interview whichever shocked town residents would agree to be exploited on camera.

During all of this, Yosuke and Souji were watching the Midnight Channel like hawks, expecting to see whomever had been on the news that evening. Chie hadn't come to school since Yukiko's death, and both boys had made her promise not to talk to any reporters. She seemed the most obvious next target for the killer, though they never voiced that fear directly to Chie herself. Honestly, Yosuke figured she probably already knew.

If Yosuke had learned one thing about the nightly news from all this, it was that it is supremely fickle. He'd thought the special reports on the Inaba Murder Massacre would go on for months, but it only took a week and a half before they were usurped in favor of other topics. He texted Souji during a report about some loud kid in a biker gang, completely incredulous. _gess we dont got 2 wrry bout Chie huh?_

Souji's reply came almost immediately. _Don't let your guard down. We have to be ready next time._

When the silhouette appeared on the Midnight Channel that same night, Yosuke wondered if having more than one Persona also gave Souji precognition.

They had to wait until the following night to be able to positively identify the figure on the Midnight Channel as Kanji Tatsumi, the same young man from the biker gang report, but neither Souji nor Yosuke knew a thing about him, so they had no idea how to enact their plan to warn him about the impending kidnapping. They went to Chie first, but it was an immediate dead end. "Yukiko was the one who knew him," she'd said, and Yosuke wasn't sure if the noise he heard over the phone was sniffling or static. He'd ended the call has quickly as he could.

Since they didn't know anyone who was close to Kanji, Yosuke and Souji had to resort to asking around at school. Information was scarce; it seemed like Kanji didn't come to school very often. To Yosuke's infinite frustration, they weren't able to find very many clues before the end of the day, and all they could do was watch the Midnight Channel again that night. The image of Kanji was perfectly clear now, which meant they were too late to warn him. The only option left was rescuing him before the next fog rolled in.

The next day, they eventually found one jittery kid who mentioned something about the Tatsumi family's textile shop in the shopping district, so they headed there next. By the time they arrived, the reporters had already beaten them there, surrounding the small woman they assumed to be Kanji's mother and inundating her with questions ("When did you notice your son was missing?" "Do you think he'll be the next murder victim?"). Souji and Yosuke waited for a while across the street at Aiya, but the crowd never dispersed. They finally left after the man behind the counter started giving them dirty looks.

Yosuke's house was closer to the shopping district, so he promised Souji he would stop by on his way to school the next morning. The shop was closed, but it seemed like he'd also beaten the first train full of reporters from Okina. He knocked on the door, then rang the bell, then rang a second time. Just a moment before he was about to give up, he saw some movement inside the shop, and Mrs. Tatsumi opened the door and peeked one bleary eye out.

"I thought I told you all, I'm done talking about it," she said, her voice small and weary.

Yosuke would have loved to leave this poor lady alone, but this was the only chance they had. "I'm so sorry, ma'am, but I'm not from the news. I go to Yasogami with your son. I just... I wanna do something to help."

Mrs. Tatsumi closed the door right in this face. Yosuke sighed and turned away, not even surprised, and was halfway down the front steps before he heard the door open again. "Please come in, young man."

\---

Despite being clearly distraught, Mrs. Tatsumi was able to provide plenty of information about her son, and Teddie was easily able to find the bathhouse inside the TV world. As it turned out, that was the only easy thing about the attempted rescue.

Souji had been able to convince Chie to meet them at Junes after a protracted pleading phone call, but she was obviously uncomfortable from the first second they arrived in the other world. She was quiet, and let Souji and Yosuke take the lead, a marked change from their trips into Yukiko's castle. When the first group of shadows attacked, Chie continued to hang back, allowing Souji and Yosuke to defeat them on their own.

"Chie-chan," Teddie said in cautious tones once the battle was over, "there's something wrong, isn't there?"

Yosuke turned to look at Chie, who had wrapped her arms around herself and looked deathly pale. "She's gone," she whispered, crouching down on the wooden floor and visibly shaking. "I can't feel her anymore. She's gone. She's _gone..._ "

"What are you talking about?" Yosuke asked, dropping to his knees and putting a hand on Chie's shoulder. "Do you mean Yukiko?"

"N- no," Chie stammered. "T- Tomoe... I can't..."

"We need to leave, now," Souji interjected, pushing Yosuke aside so he could gently pull Chie up, wrapping a steadying arm around her waist. He marched off back towards the entrance without another word.

Teddie sidled up to Yosuke, squeaking shoes giving away his approach. "Yuki-chan was important to Chie-chan, wasn't she? Chie-chan depended on Yuki-chan a lot. So now that Yuki-chan is gone, Chie-chan can't call her Persona anymore." The whole bear suit leaned forward slightly, like it was bowing its head. "It's too dangerous in here if you don't have a Persona. Sensei was right to make her leave."

"D'you think she'll be able to get Tomoe back?" Yosuke asked. _We need her,_ was the thought he didn't say. _Or else we'll just fail again._

"I don't know," Teddie said sadly. "But I think..." he trailed off, then looked at Yosuke with the most serious gaze a bear suit could manage. "I think if she'd stayed here much longer, you and Sensei would have had to fight her Shadow again. I could feel it inside her... and it felt much meaner than the first time."

\---

Even though it left them critically short-handed, Yosuke and Souji didn't ask Chie to come back into the TV world with them. Souji decided to try going back in two days later, but with just the two of them they were barely able to clear the first floor of the bathhouse.

"Maybe we should try fighting some easier shadows," Souji suggested, turning to Teddie. "Can you take us back to the castle?"

Teddie shook his head. "It's overrun. All the shadows there are beary strong now. Yuki-chan's Shadow attracted them."

Yosuke swore under his breath. "We'll just have to stay here then," Souji said. He looked ahead at the staircase they'd just reached, tightened his grip on his sword, then headed up to the next floor.

They spent the next three afternoons in the TV world, each trip more difficult and desperate than the last. After a particularly nasty battle on day three, Yosuke finally reached out and grabbed hold of Souji's elbow. "Partner, we need to stop. We're just going to get ourselves killed."

Souji seemed as though he was going to keep pressing ahead regardless of Yosuke's protests until Yosuke said the word "killed." At that, he froze, then slowly lowered his sword. "You're right. If you and I fail here, we won't be able to rescue anyone. We'll just be two more dead bodies." He grimaced and nodded at Teddie. "Take us home for today. We'll take a break for a while. I'll come back better prepared."

Yosuke didn't understand how spending a string of afternoons hanging out with him, or going to his clubs after school, or doing weird little tasks around town was supposed to make Souji better prepared for the TV world. He even asked Souji about it once, but the explanation he got was so vague and rambling that Yosuke didn't feel any more enlightened after hearing it than when he'd been living in mystery. They went back into the TV world when the forecast showed a string of rainy days, and Yosuke couldn't help but notice that Souji did seem stronger somehow; he called on Personas Yosuke had never seen before, and the shadows were dying with surprising speed.

Even so, they had once again underestimated the sheer size of the bathhouse Kanji had created. On the seventh floor, they faced down one of those tall muscled shadows, far stronger than anything they had faced so far. They managed to beat it, but just barely, and they were so battered and bruised at the end of it that Teddie finally put his squeaky foot down and wouldn't let them go any further.

The next day they were able to return to the other world was a couple of days later; Souji had wanted to go in sooner, but Yosuke hadn't been able to get the afternoons off work despite all the pleading he did with his father. There were more floors left than they had anticipated, and it was slow-going with only the two of them, but they finally managed to reach the door behind which, according to Teddie, they would find Kanji.

The scene on the other side of the door was a massacre. There were three huge muscled Shadows there, two slightly smaller ones flanking a larger one; the large one was on its hands and knees, crouched over a smaller form on the floor. In front of Yosuke, Souji's sword clattered to the ground; somewhere behind him, Teddie screamed.

The Shadow looked at the three of them, and blood dripped from its mouth when it smiled.

\---

Yosuke had nightmares for weeks. He dreamed about the top floor of the bathhouse, blood painting the wooden floors, and Kanji's Shadow, bending over Kanji's dead and broken body with that gruesome smile. Had Yukiko's Shadow done the same to her? Had Saki-senpai even had a Shadow to rip her apart like that? He was glad that he didn't have to know for sure, but that didn't stop his brain from creating new and horrifying scenarios every night.

Sometimes he dreamed about his Shadow trying to consume him, but Souji was always there to rescue Yosuke from himself, even in the nightmares.

Risette appeared on the Midnight Channel in June, and Yosuke was terrified to even make plans to go into the TV world to try and rescue her. Luckily idols were much easier to research than nobodies in a small town, so Souji and Yosuke spent an afternoon in Yosuke's room on his computer, looking up all the latest rumors. When Yosuke really thought about it, it was kind of creepy how easy it was to track down a famous person just by using the internet. They went to Marukyu Tofu the next day, but Risette's grandmother refused to let them speak with her, no matter how hard they begged.

When Risette showed up on the Midnight Channel again, wearing a bikini and winking and smiling, Yosuke didn't feel anything apart from a chill in his heart.

They went into the TV the next day, armed with the information they had gathered from the internet, confident that it would be enough to help Teddie find the place where Risette lay hidden. Teddie listened carefully as Yosuke rattled off fact after fact, until finally his ears twitched and he pointed off into the distance. "That way!"

It shouldn't have surprised Yosuke that the shadows in the strip club were even more tenacious than the ones they'd faced before. They were completely wiped out after only three fights, and it took all of Yosuke's remaining energy to even make it back to the entrance without passing out. "W- we'll come back again," Souji choked out, leaning heavily on his sword. "As many times as it takes."

Over the next two weeks, they spent more afternoons in the other world than they did in the real one. Every battle was a struggle, despite the two of them combining all their yen to buy new weapons at Daidara's. Souji had new Personas again, a fairy and an angel and a weird anthropomorphic cat, but even their new powers weren't enough to help them overcome more than a few groups of shadows at a time.

When Yosuke saw a string of rainy days on the forecast, he felt a short-lived feeling of relief before the guilt washed it away.

He was almost angry at Souji for insisting they make one more trip into the TV world on the second day of rain, but he didn't have work as a convenient excuse, so they went in together and tried and failed one last time. "We did our best," Souji said darkly, and he looked back towards Teddie, ready to tell the bear that they were ready to go home.

"No, no, no, no, no..." Teddie was saying, paws clutching at the side of his head. "I've tried so hard... I tried so beary hard to help... but it wasn't enough... people keep dying in Teddie's world and I can't do anything..."

Dark shadowy tendrils were starting to flow out from around Teddie, and Yosuke leapt into action, tapping into energy reserves he thought he had exhausted long ago. "Teddie, no!" he cried, and Susano-O flared into life behind him protectively.

"The truth is," said a voice that sounded both like and unlike Teddie's, "that you never could help. Because you are worthless. You are nothing. Hollow. An empty shell."

"No! Shuddup!" the real Teddie shouted, spinning around to face his Shadow.

Yosuke was about to say something, but he felt Souji's calloused fingertips brush against the inside of his wrist. "We need to leave," Souji whispered in his ear. "We can't fight that thing. We have to leave _now._ "

Before Yosuke could even start to argue, Souji grabbed him by the wrist and started to run. "How can you find something when you know not what you search for?!" the Shadow was yelling, and Yosuke had no idea who exactly it was yelling at.

The fog rolled in, and so did Rise Kujikawa's body.

\---

It had been foggy every day since Risette had been found dead, and Yosuke's nightmares were getting worse. He started sneaking over to the Dojima house at night and crawling into Souji's room through the window, where they would lie awake together to make sure the Midnight Channel didn't come on. Souji's uncle barely ever came home anymore, and the arrangement only got easier when Souji's cousin Nanako got sick and had to be hospitalized. "They think it's asthma or pneumonia," Souji explained, sitting on the futon with his knees pulled up to his chest. "Caused by the fog, I guess."

By the end of July, Yosuke was more or less staying at the Dojima house full time. He told himself that it was to keep Souji company, so he didn't have to stay in that awful empty house all alone, but it was just as much for himself as it was for his partner. Even with Souji's comforting form next to him, Yosuke barely slept anymore, and now the images of Shadows consuming their hosts were haunting him even in his daydreams.

Yosuke hadn't even realized it was raining on the night when the kid detective showed up on the Midnight Channel. They'd long since stopped watching the news, despite the information they could possibly glean from the interviews or even just the weather report. Everyone other than Souji was starting to creep Yosuke out. "Does that person look familiar to you?" Yosuke asked, nudging Souji gently with an elbow.

Souji looked like he had been about to fall asleep, but Yosuke knew better; Souji's insomnia was nearly as bad as Yosuke's. "Mmm," he murmured, blinking at the screen, "I think my uncle mentioned him once? He came in to work on the murder case. I don't even know his name." He laughed uncomfortably, pressing a hand to his face. "Would we even be able to find him without Teddie?"

Yosuke wondered what had happened to Teddie after they'd run -- after they abandoned him -- and he felt sick to his stomach just thinking about it. Risette's body had been spit out from the TV world, presumably after her Shadow was done with her, but there was no sign of a red and blue bear suit. What had Teddie really been, anyway?

"I dunno," Yosuke said, as much in answer to his own questions as to Souji's. "D- do you wanna try?"

\---

They met the next afternoon in the fog-blanketed Junes food court, and Souji's grim face echoed Yosuke's desperate mood. Yosuke kept his hands in his pockets, his sweat-slicked palms gripping the handles of his kunai as if they could somehow anchor him to a reality that was rapidly unraveling all around them. They'd been so stupid and hopeful. What was that dumb saying about hindsight? Not that it even really mattered.

They had become used to the glare of the studio lights in the creepy backlot on the other side of the Junes TV, but this time it was considerably darker. Yosuke peered up into the dim light; from what he could tell, the bulb in the nearest visible light had been shattered. The idea of the shadows climbing in the scaffolding, let alone being in the backlot they'd considered to be safe, was too upsetting to dwell upon for long.

"S- so, what's the plan, partner?" Yosuke asked, trying his best to sound upbeat and optimistic despite feeling anything but. He'd already taken his kunai out of his pockets and was holding them in front of himself defensively, which might have made him feel like a wimp if he hadn't seen Souji doing the exact same thing.

A long moment passed before Souji responded. "I wish I had a Persona that could sense things like Teddie could," he said, biting his lip and closing his eyes in a way Yosuke had come to recognize as frustration. "But I don't, so we'll just have to pick a direction and hope."

Yosuke paused, hesitant to express himself after months of unwavering trust in Souji's judgement, but if all their previous failures hadn't proven that his partner wasn't infallible then he wasn't sure what would. "That's not much of a plan, partner," he said softly.

"Do you have a better plan, Yosuke?" Souji snapped, whirling to face him, a fire behind his grey eyes. "It was your idea to come here in the first place! Not just today, either; it was all your idea, right from the start!"

Yosuke flinched as if struck. How long had Souji been holding all this back? "I- I don't know... I just..."

"You just _what,_ Yosuke?" Souji cut in. "You just wanted one last chance to play hero? You just wanted to try one more time to save someone, as though that'll somehow erase all the blood on our hands already? Or maybe you just wanted to come in here to die like some kind of martyr?" HIs voice faltered, and he turned away, the burst of anger dissipating as quickly as it had come on.

It was silent for a long time after that, Souji continuing to stare off into the distance, Yosuke looking down at his kunai and trying desperately to think of what to say. It wasn't like anything Souji had said was wrong, really. When it came down to it, this whole stupid thing had been Yosuke's idea. Whether he was prepared to hear that extrapolated into everything being his _fault_ was a separate matter entirely. Why had he wanted to come here today, anyway? They didn't even know that detective kid. After everything that had happened, all the friends they'd lost, what was just another stranger anyway? Especially when each successive trip here had put them in greater danger than the last. If Souji hadn't given him the order to run when Teddie's Shadow had attacked, would they even still be alive to be having this argument today?

Was the possibility of saving a stranger worth the possibility of never having an argument with Souji again?

Yosuke looked up; Souji hadn't moved at all in the indeterminate amount of time since he'd stopped shouting. He reached out and softly touched Souji's elbow, half expecting Souji to pull away. That didn't happen, though, so Yosuke figured it was okay to step in closer, wrapping his arms around Souji, resting a cheek against the back of Souji's shoulder.

"Partner, let's just go," he breathed into Souji's shirt. "You're right, this was a stupid idea. The whole thing. Let's get out of here."

Souji tensed a little at Yosuke's words, then sighed and leaned back slightly into the hug. "Yeah."

Neither of them moved right away, but eventually Souji pulled away and turned towards the center of the backlot, where Teddie had always kept the stack of exit TVs. "Yosuke," he breathed, a note of fear in his tone.

Yosuke whirled around to look; the exit wasn't there.

"W- why though?" Yosuke said, turning back to look at Souji and seeing the same fear that he felt plainly reflected on his partner's face. "They've always been here, Teddie always said--"

"Teddie," Souji interrupted. "Maybe he--"

"No!" Yosuke shouted, scrubbing a hand over his face. "No way, he couldn't have. His body would have shown up on our side, right?!"

"Not necessarily," Souji said. "He wasn't originally from our world, remember? He lived here. Maybe this world only... spits out what doesn't belong."

" _Stop it!_ " Yosuke shouted as he dropped to one knee, his stomach in knots. Teddie couldn't be dead, they didn't even know what he was. Could he even die?

The gentle pressure of Souji's hand on his shoulder brought Yosuke back from the verge of panic. "Either way," Souji said, voice louder and more leader-like than it had been so far today, "he's clearly not in a position to worry about our exit. So we should look for him. Maybe we can find that detective in the meantime."

Souji summoned a pumpkin-headed thing with a lantern to help light the way, and despite the fact that it still wasn't much of a plan, they picked a direction and started walking. They'd thought they were walking towards the strip club where they'd last seen Teddie, but the walkways twisted and turned in ways that were unfamiliar. Maybe the whole damn place was really alive and changing all the time, actively plotting against them. Or maybe they were just really good at getting themselves hopelessly lost.

Out of all the places in the TV world, they ended up at the place Yosuke wanted to be the least. The twisted shopping district was considerably darker now than it had been the first time he'd been here with Souji and Teddie; the sky was pitch black, and if he looked closely he could see the indistinct blobs of partially manifested shadows looming in the windows of all the stores. Souji tensed and raised his sword; Yosuke instinctively flanked him, pressing their backs together. He could see dark shapes everywhere he looked, and while he was pretty sure not all of them could be malicious shadows as opposed to the normal everyday trick of the light kind, he definitely didn't want to take any chances.

They stood in front of the liquor store in that defensive pose for what seemed like ages, both of them staring the shadows down as though a sharp glare would make them melt away. There was no telling how strong these shadows were; the ones Souji had fought here back in April had been fairly weak, but there had only been a few of them. Now there were dozens, maybe over a hundred, all waiting patiently for a chance to strike.

Yosuke was about to open his mouth to ask for suggestions when he heard Souji inhale sharply behind him. He risked glancing over his shoulder, then forgot himself completely and spun around to stare at what Souji had seen.

There was a bright light at the far end of the street, past Aiya and Daidara's and maybe even past Yomenaido. All of the shadows had gone still and were staring at it too, completely motionless. Then, as if entranced, the shadows came out of the buildings in which they had been hiding and started moving towards the light like a dark river.

"Partner," Yosuke said warningly, putting a hand on Souji's shoulder. "I know what you're going to say, and it's a _bad idea._ "

"What should we do then?" Souji asked, not even glancing at Yosuke. "Stand here in this street forever? Leave in the other direction and end up somewhere else, where the shadows are ready and willing to kill us?" He paused and swallowed, as if trying to convince himself. "I think that light is the best chance we have right now."

There was a cold weight in the pit of Yosuke's stomach, but he couldn't think of a satisfactory argument that wouldn't make Souji start yelling at him again. "O- okay," he said, sliding his hand down to grip Souji's arm, right above the elbow. "J- just, if it starts to look dangerous, promise me we'll run."

"Promise," Souji said, and the two of them followed the swarm of shadows down the street towards the light. As they drew closer, Yosuke brought his free hand up to his face to shield his eyes, trying to pick out as many details as he could. Even after he'd managed to make his eyes adjust, he didn't quite believe what he saw.

In the middle of the halo of light was a woman in a flowing white gown. The shadows were pooling at her feet, swirling and coalescing into one solid mass. Souji shuddered and fell to his knees, clutching at his chest; Yosuke dropped to one knee beside him, then glared up at the woman defiantly. He had to squint, but he could have sworn that she was smiling right at Souji.

"Welcome, sinful sons of man," the woman said, her voice echoing in Yosuke's ears. "My, my, such tragedy has befallen you. And to think I had such high hopes." She laughed then, a pale and hollow sound. "You had such potential, you know. The spark I stirred in you was capable of drawing many powerful allies. Such a shame that you were unable to save more than one." The woman's gaze shifted to Yosuke now, and his whole body shuddered involuntarily. "And what a pathetic, worthless ally he turned out to be."

"S- stop it," Souji choked out, pulling himself to his feet with his sword as leverage. "You don't know a goddamn _thing_ about Yosuke."

She laughed the same mirthless laugh. "I know more than you could ever imagine, mortal. Do you truly believe your wasted efforts have gone unnoticed? How tiresome it was to watch you come into my realm again and again, each time to fail more miserably than before. How pitiful." She stepped forward and Souji staggered again, the tip of his sword scraping on the asphalt; the shadows followed her like the train of a dress. Once she was within arm's reach, she stretched out her hand and placed it gently on Souji's cheek, tipping his face up so he was looking into her eyes. "To think I believed you might be the one to challenge me. Perhaps it is I who am the fool."

The woman vanished with no warning, taking the blinding light and the shadows with her. What was left in her place was the very last thing Yosuke ever wanted to see: a mirror image of Souji with glowing yellow eyes.

"No way," Yosuke breathed. He lost his grip on one of his kunai and it clattered to the ground. "No way, that's impossible, you never had--"

"'Never had a Shadow?'" The Shadow's tone was mocking, and it glared right at Yosuke, sneering. "Poor, naive Yosuke. We really resent you, you know?"

Yosuke felt like he'd been stabbed. He shouldn't have been surprised, considering the fight they'd had earlier, but even then the Shadow's words stung. "That's fine," Yosuke said, looking down at his dropped kunai. "That's fine, it is my fault. But I don't care if you resent me for it, because... because even if all we did together was fail, you still saved _me,_ partner."

"Oh, how precious," the Shadow said, the horrible smile never fading from its lips. " _We_ saved _you._ No shit, all we ever _do_ is save you! We ran away from Yukiko's Shadow because _you_ weren't able to heal us. We ran away from Kanji's because it scared _you._ We never even found Risette's, and then we ran from Teddie's because we knew _you_ were too chicken-shit to even attack it!"

"Th- that's not fair," Souji interjected; he spoke slowly and deliberately, carefully choosing his words. "It may be true, but I-- we were scared too. We never could have gotten as far as we did without Yosuke."

"Please." The Shadow rolled its eyes emphatically. "Don't hide how we really feel. It's so dreadfully tiring, just going along with everything this idiot suggests. He already knows it's his fault; you didn't even need me to tell him that." He turned his attention back to Yosuke, his yellow eyes cold. "Do you want to know the real reason we can't sleep at night?"

Souji fell to his knees next to Yosuke, an anguished look on his face. "Please, you don't have to do this..."

"It's because we dream about what ridiculous idea of yours is finally going to get us both killed."

Yosuke whirled to look at Souji, the real Souji, and saw his own feeling of betrayal reflected in his partner's eyes. All the words he'd thought of saying died on his lips. "Souji... Souji, that's fine, it's okay, e- even if that's true I understand, dreams are kinda crazy anyway, right?" While he blurted out half-hearted reassurances, Yosuke's brain helpfully drew the horrible parallel that he didn't dare say out loud: _in our dreams, Souji fixes everything; in his, all you do is destroy._

"Aww, look at you, poor precious thing." Yosuke felt a hand on his shoulder, and he turned to see the Shadow standing right next to him, breath cold on Yosuke's cheek. The hand moved up and ran a thumb along Yosuke's jaw in a weirdly affectionate way. "But don't you worry. No matter how awful you are, no matter how many times we fail because of you, we can't possibly give up on you. Do you want to know why?"

"Stop it," Souji begged desperately.

The Shadow grinned and pressed its nose to Yosuke's. "Because we know you'll never leave us, never cast us aside, never take us for granted, if only because you know deep down that you're too _stupid_ to live without us."

Yosuke pulled away from the Shadow's grasp and looked at Souji, who was staring at the Shadow in disbelief. "You... that's not... why would you say that? You _can't_ be me, because then you would know that I--"

"You _idiot!_ " The Shadow threw its head back and laughed exuberantly. Tendrils of shadowy smoke were seeping out of its body as it started to twist and re-form. "You knew what would happen! You fucking _knew!_ But you went ahead and did it anyway, just like you've done all along!"

Yosuke clasped both hands around Souji's arm, trying desperately to pull him to his feet. "Partner, we have to run! We have to go now!" He hazarded a glance at the Shadow and the sight made all his blood run cold; it was hundreds of creatures all at once, flickering and changing. He could see the wings of a fairy, the talons of a bird, the tail of a snake, a sword, a staff, a spear. And faces, so many faces, all wearing numbered masks, the whole damn thing was covered with them.

"I am a Shadow," the monstrosity said, growing larger and larger until it towered over the both of them. Its voice was now many voices all at once, all of the faces speaking together. "The true self! Now I can finally be rid of you!"

Souji was still doubled over on the ground; Yosuke thought he might be muttering something but he couldn't make it out. "Souji!" he screamed desperately, yanking on Souji's arm with all the strength he could manage. "We have to run! Get up, please, I'm begging you--"

"N- no," Souji said, finally pulling himself to his feet and raising his sword in front of him. "I have to face it. I have to fight it."

"Souji, stop it, don't be stupid!" Tears were streaming down Yosuke's face and his voice kept catching in his throat. "We can't fight that, it's impossible, please, partner...!"

"It's been impossible this whole time!" Souji shouted, spreading his feet apart into a fighting stance. His whole body was shaking; he couldn't keep the sword steady. "The whole thing, right from the start! It's always been impossible!"

"Please," Yosuke repeated, unable to think of anything else to say. "Please, partner, don't do this, you _promised..._ "

Souji stretched out his hand in the same way he always did when summoning one of his Personas. This time, though, the familiar shining blue tarot card didn't appear in his palm. "No," he said, pulling his hand back and trying the gesture again. "No, why?!"

"You really are a fool!" the Shadow said in all its myriad voices. "Don't you get it? You've already summoned us! We're right here!" All of the voices laughed, a horrifying cacophony. Souji turned to meet Yosuke's eyes; even after all the terrifying, fucked up things that had happened to them, Yosuke had never seen Souji look so scared.

Yosuke didn't have to beg again; they turned and fled, sprinting down the street back towards the liquor store. They kept running even after the scenery faded away; their feet made heavy clanging noises on the metal scaffolding. Yosuke thought they might have run past Yukiko's castle, but he couldn't be sure with all the tears in his eyes.

Finally Yosuke ran out of breath and had to stop, doubling over onto himself and panting hard. Souji stopped a moment later, then circled back to Yosuke. "Are you okay?"

"Are you?" Yosuke couldn't even look up, his blurred vision fixed on the grass beneath his feet. "All your Personas, they--"

"They're gone," Souji said. "I mean, they're out _there_ now. And I can't..." He broke off and Yosuke finally looked up to see a tear trickle down Souji's cheek.

He didn't even have to think about it; it was like his muscles moved all on their own, bridging the gap between himself and Souji and wrapping him up in a tight hug, closing his eyes and resting his head on Souji's shoulder.

It was eerily silent apart from Souji's quiet sobs, then Souji's voice hitched and half of a laugh spilled out. "You dumbass, that's for girls."

Yosuke couldn't help but laugh, too. "Shut up, idiot."

Souji's arms encircled Yosuke's waist, a silent signal of truce. "Hey," he whispered after another long moment, "look where we ended up."

Yosuke opened his eyes and looked around; if he'd still harbored any doubt that the TV world wasn't alive and openly fucking with them, he certainly didn't anymore. It was the riverbank, carbon-copied from the exact place he'd always gone with Souji, except the river was dry, the grass was withered and yellow, and the sky was laced with red and black.

"You know," Souji said, "the real cosmic irony would have been if the TV world had recreated that trash can I found you in."

"Very funny, partner," Yosuke said, burying his face in Souji's neck. He stayed there for a long moment, just breathing slowly, trying to ignore the panic that was bubbling inside him. Finally he pulled away to look Souji right in the eyes. "Hey. All that stuff your Shadow said..."

Souji bit his lip and looked away. "It wasn't lying. I don't think Shadows _can_ lie. But... it wasn't telling the whole truth, either. It's not really that I think I have to protect you because you're stupid. I mean, you _are_ stupid, but that's not the real reason." Souji paused and took a deep breath, then sat down on the dry riverbank with his knees pulled up to his chest. Yosuke sat next to him without hesitation, patiently waiting until Souji worked up the courage to speak again. "It's just, we've lost so many people, you know? I don't just mean the people we couldn't save, either; Chie, Nanako, my uncle, we've lost practically the whole town at this point. And when I think about losing you, it tears me up inside. Because you're the single person I couldn't bear to lose."

Yosuke's mouth went dry. He tried to say something, anything, but it felt like his tongue was made of sand. He was abruptly grateful that Souji's gaze was fixed firmly on his own knees, because he couldn't even imagine what kind of ridiculous face he must be making. When he determined there was no way he was going to make his voice work any time soon, he settled for simply leaning over and pressing his shoulder to Souji's.

There was no telling how much time passed while the two of them sat like that in the foggy silence. Yosuke kept replaying Souji's words over and over in his head; it was just as much of a confession as the one he'd given Souji on the hill overlooking Inaba. That felt like ages ago now, a whole other lifetime. He'd honestly thought the whole thing had gone straight over Souji's head, and who knew, maybe it had? Maybe Souji's own realization had been independent of any ridiculous thing Yosuke had said. It's not like you could really ask about that kind of thing.

Instead, Yosuke rested his head on Souji's shoulder and sighed. "We never stood a chance, did we, partner?"

Souji didn't respond to that question at all. "Do you think Chie's okay?" he asked instead, leaning his head on top of Yosuke's.

Guilt washed over Yosuke like a wave. He couldn't even remember the last time he'd tried to contact Chie; he'd sent her a few texts after the incident with her Persona, but she'd never answered them, and after the horrible encounter with Kanji's Shadow he'd somehow managed to forget about her entirely. To be fair, he'd forgotten about most people other than Souji, but that didn't make it any less inexcusable. "I hope so. Maybe she escaped before the fog got too bad."

"I hope so," Souji echoed, and they both fell back into an uneasy silence.

Yosuke closed his eyes, trying to remember all the things that were good and perfect about this moment. Being stuck irretrievably in the TV world wasn't good. The fact that they were going to die here certainly wasn't good. But, despite it being broken and twisted, this world had recreated the place in Inaba that meant the most to him and Souji. Nothing had come out to attack them yet. Most importantly of all, he was here with the person who meant the most to him in the entire world, and now he knew that person felt the exact same way.

He looked up at the red-and-black striped sky, and saw that the fog was beginning to clear.


End file.
